Two Ships

The sails come down as the storm of us subsides. Two ships in the night, slowly drifting their separate ways under exhaling time zones. A border wall between two lives we are finally choosing to return to. The moonlight spills across your hands, mapping the lines I no longer have the right to touch.

We are folding up this secret world
like a heavy, blood-stained cloth. It was a sanctuary built on theft, a beautiful house we ran to while our own homes grew cold and quiet.

This grief is a jagged thing in the throat. It is the death of a version of ourselves that only existed in this sea, in these hours, under the weight of a borrowed name. I am mourning the person I was with you— the one who felt chosen, even if it was a lie.

We look at each other one last time,
not with the hunger of the beginning, but with the hollow ache of the end. We are choosing the people who wait for us, the ones who deserve the honesty we spent months burning for fuel.

I step out into the night air, and the silence is sudden and absolute. I am carrying the weight of you back into a life that has no room for it, walking toward a door I shouldn’t have left, while the flash of your light house fades into the distance like a guttering flame.

The seasons turn, and your name is a stone I have carried until my pockets are frayed. The silence between us has grown teeth;
it eats the space where we used to breathe, until the memory of your voice is a thin, fading radio signal in a storm. 

I see you sometimes in the peripheral— a coat that looks like yours at the market, the way a stranger tilts their head in the rain—
and the ghost of us reaches out,
only to find the air is cold and empty.

I have learned to look away before the ache can settle into my bones.  We are living the lives we chose to save, polishing the surfaces of old routines until they shine with a forced, brittle light.

But beneath the floorboards of this normalcy, there is a hollow sound that never fills, a debt that can only be paid in absence. We are two islands now, drifting further into our own separate oceans.

The map we drew in the dark is gone, and the only thing left of the fire is the way I still check the horizon for the ship that is never there.

The static has finally settled into a hum, a sound I can live beside without flinching. I no longer reach for my phone in the theater of the night, my thumbs have forgotten the rhythm of your name.

The house I returned to is no longer a cage; it is simply the place where I keep my life, the walls familiar, the floorboards solid. The guilt that once tasted like copper has faded into a dull, weathered copper— a green patina on a statue of who we were.

I see a ship like yours and I don’t follow it. I hear our song and I don’t turn it off. I let the notes wash over me like gray rain, acknowledging the beauty of the storm while staying dry beneath my own roof.

We are ghosts that have stopped haunting. I have folded the memory of your touch into a small, neat square and tucked it away in a drawer I no longer feel the need to open.

I am whole in the silence you left behind. I am breathing the air of a life that is mine, and for the first time in years, the horizon is just the horizon.

The morning arrives without the weight of you. The sun hits the floor in a straight, clean line, and I do not look for a message in the dust motes.
The coffee is just coffee; the steam rises without forming the shape of your ghost.

There is a mercy in this ordinary light. I have stopped rehearsing the things I’d say if we ever crossed paths in the rain. The silence has lost its sharp edges and smoothed into a cool, calm lake.

I walk through my days with soft footfalls, no longer bracing for a blow or a memory. The secret we carried has finally dissolved, leaving only the quiet strength of the ground beneath a person who has come home.

It is enough to simply exist in the stillness, to be a story that has reached its final page, resting on a shelf in a room full of light.

The book is closed. The ink has dried into the paper, and the shelf is steady under its weight. There is nothing left to translate or undo;
just the soft, rhythmic sound of a life being lived in the present.

The porch light stays on for those inside, and the road beyond the driveway is just a road, leading nowhere we need to go. This peace is not a victory, but a long, slow exhale in the dark.

We have arrived at the silence
that doesn’t need to be broken.

©2026 by Mel Gutiér

Sleep Gone

I sleep in segments

Between disappointing pasts

And loathsome memories

Beneath the shadow of dreams

Lingering in corridors of regret

An empty refuge

A vacant solitude

The sludge of worry

Soldering life’s tapestry

A gnawing anxiety

Biting the neck of REM

I sleep in fragments

Broken thoughts

Puzzling butterflies

Origami visions

Conjuring up storms

Of decaying lullabies

A parade of melancholy

In a quarry of pain

I. Do. Not. Sleep.

Except to wake and…

Find

You

Gone

© Mel Gutiér 2025

Hope at sunset

There was an ache in her belly as she stood on the balcony, waiting to see her beloved cross over the castle barriers. Her breath was heavy, and tears were beginning to sprout. Her flaxen hair imprisoned by the wind. On the horizon, a sunset full of pink and orange dreams made tears flow down her face. How can something so beautiful bring with it so much despair?

“Your majesty! Shall I send in the first line?”

“No. He’s not here yet. He’s…”

“Your majesty, they’re closing in. They’ll be at the gates soon! If we don’t–“

“If we don’t wait, he’ll be killed.”

“With all due respect, your majesty, he may already be dead.”

She turned around to face him with a fearsome look. She wiped away her tears violently.

“Listen to me! I am your Queen! You are not to send in the first line until I say! And I will not say until I see him cross the cliffs! Is that clear?”

Her first officer, was reluctant and wanted to insist. But before he could do so…

“Your majesty!” he shouted, motioning her to look behind her towards the horizon.

“He made it! He did it! Send in the first line right away, I will meet the others on the bridge!”

“Yes, majesty!”

Her body collapsed into itself. A great relief warmed her as she saw her love approaching the gates on the north end of the castle. She rushed to the bridge to meet the others, but not before heading to the north end. She needed him to look into her eyes intensely, lovingly. She needed to touch him, feel him, and embrace him… perhaps for the last time.

© Mel Gutiér 2025

Only in my dreams

I see you in my thoughts

Like a movie under moonlight

Wide-eyed joy and melancholy

Open wide my soul

In my lonely longing

I spread my lungs in breath

You’re hiding on my lips

Sweet surrender of a kiss

In the dreams I dream

Your mouth on my body

Leaving bookmarks on my skin

Picking up where we left off

The soothe of kindred words

I see you in my thoughts

I see you in my dreams

I feel you on my skin

But only in my dreams

© 2024 – Mel Gutiér